Perfect Promises are Always Kept

Yesterday morning I awoke with despair in my heart. The previous night, my sister and her boyfriend had been to the house and I woke up thinking about how long it has really been since I last had a pleasant conversation with my prodigal husband. I actually remember it pretty well. I don't remember the words, but I remember that it was a Saturday morning. He inadvertently woke me up when he got out of bed really early and I followed him out to the living room to sit and talk.

I loved talking to him at that sleepy time of morning just after dawn when the television was off and the whole world was still in bed. Just the two of us and nowhere to go, we could really connect and my craving for quality conversation with him could be somewhat satisfied. Unfortunately, nature called me and I asked to pause the conversation so I could use the restroom. I had just sat down on the thrown when my husband walked in behind me. (I let him know I thought that was pretty rude, too.) I held it until he finished brushing his teeth, then finished my business quickly and washed my hands.

Walking back into the living room to finish my sleepy Saturday morning conversation with the husband who barely ever had time for me, I saw him stroke his comb through his hair one final time then slip it into his pocket. No longer in his bedclothes, he was fully dressed (in actual decent-fitting and presentable clothes) and looked to be on his way out the door. Keep in mind, it was only 6:30 am on Saturday.

My honey did not really have an answer when I asked where he was going. He just deflected my questions by stating that he thought I was going to take a shower. We got into a fight at that point. I so looked forward to Saturdays as the only day my heart was fed by contact with my husband that I flipped out when I caught him trying to sneak out the door while I was using the bathroom. Finally, I screamed at him to get out and never come back. He left and I broke down into a pile of tears and sobbing. As soon as I was able to get them under control a little (mere minutes), I called his cell, apologized and asked if he would come back to the house for me. He refused and did not come back until later that night.

I now know my hero had been on his way to see his mistress when I caught him sneaking out of the house. When I asked him to turn around to come get me, he was still on his way to see her.

But that story is not the reason for this post. Back to what I was trying to say. I awoke with despair in my heart and began to think of how long it has been since I actually held a pleasant conversation with my husband. It has been a very long time. (The above incident occurred near the end of October 2007.) I began to feel hopeless with the immensity of time that has passed.

BUT THEN I started thinking about all God has accomplished for my benefit in that time. I used to be an under-appreciated, over-educated homemaker / slave whose husband took advantage of and neglected her, considering her to be valueless, whose children ignored and disrespected her, and whose in-laws had nothing nice to say about her. Since my husband threw me and my life's work in the garbage, look at what the Great Redeemer has done with the remaining pieces of me:

• My daughter, turning 17, has now witnessed through the renovations of the house I bought for almost nothing (the price of the 401K I was awarded through our divorce) how a family can pull together to help one of its members.
• She has also been to regular church services for the past four years.
• She has seen literal live miracles and knows God guards His children.
• She has learned and seen that love is an action first and is WAY more than just a fuzzy feeling.
• She has been invited to apply to both Yale and Princeton Universities.
• I have a house that is paid off and will be a nice place to live with just a little more work.
• My neighbors all know and seem to like me.
• My parents and two siblings know how to get to my house and have visited it on several occasions.
• I have written a novel, a novella and am about to finish a novelette. The book and novella have made it into a couple of libraries.
• I had an article written about me in a foreign newspaper.
• I have multiple blogs, two of which are growing in popularity.
• I have a growing online audience of people who enjoy my writing. (To think! I used to write to my husband every day and he never even cared. If only he had known I was a future famous author!)
• My writing has reached around the world. People on literally every continent except Antarctica have read something I have written.
• 1000 Bookmarks with my name on them were handed out at local (district-wide) Halfprice Book stores, building my name recognition.
• Several cars wear bumper stickers with my name on them.
• People in my community know, respect and (believe it or not) ADMIRE me.
• My first novel is about to win a prestigious award. (Positive thinking! Finalists will be announced on August 1st.)

Thinking of all this, my spirits perked up considerably. It is nothing short of amazing that all of the above has been accomplished since November 2008, when I came to my parents' home broken and in despair.

I opened up my computer Bible to search for the verse I knew applied. Here it is:

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28

God is Amazing! If He has done ALL OF THAT for me just since November 2008, then I know He has in that same period of time been accomplishing just as tremendous feats in the heart that I pray for daily (my husband's). I know that He can and WILL bring my prodigal, covenant spouse home when the work on his heart is done and the time is right. I also know that my prodigal's heart will be soft and warm again, instead of cold and hard like it was the last time he and I had a "pleasant conversation." I just need to keep waiting, trusting and remembering that Perfect Promises are Always Kept.

May the Lord bless and keep you.